Zen and the Art of 50th Anniversaries

Eight people. Four who eat traditional Chinese when they eat out, four who go for sweet and sour chicken balls. Possible, barely - two generations out to dinner in two pairs of pairs.

Zen is up in Clayton Park West, a part of the world reserved for car zombies, that sub race of people who cannot survive without a car. Designed by computer programs, with plans approved by wordprocessors, Clayton Park West is my personal idea of what hell probably resembles.

But even the car zombies have to eat, and sometimes, in the burbs, great food can be found.

I drove, therefore I ate:

Fried dumplings. A bunch of them - yummy. As good as any I have had, including King Wah.
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Lemon Chicken, stolen from my Mom's plate - nothing special, Fans/Frans in Dartmouth, near BIO, is better.

Ginger Beef, bro-in-law Pete's fave thing from here, for good reason it turns out - I'll order this again. Coated strip of pork loin, double bite size, some heat, gingery, on the sweet side.

Mongolian Beef - great spice with some real death hot lurking then leaving, tender beef, needs more veg than comes with it, but excellent stuff.

Emperor's Pork Ribs - Partly dry pork chops in a BBQ sauce - I want General Tao's Pork, or whatever that guy's name was. Fan's again.

Cashew Chicken in "Brown Sauce". I put the quotes around the "brown sauce" because the stuff was "not brown". It was a freaky fluorescent red sauce that made you feel like an extra in a zombie dracula movie when you wiped your face with a napkin. YIKES! It glows in the dark! It tastes like cherries! Save me, this can't be food! But it is. I ate a bunch. I figure it is miles better than what my buddy Ed had to eat when in China. At least this was not looking back at me, or running on a wheel five minutes beforehand.

And I also ate a whole pile of steamed rice. This was a great meal, with interesting company (OK, it was my parent's 50 Wedding Anniversary and they were there with their actual best man and bridesmaid from 1956. That couple got married later, but on seeing me, chose not to have any kids, at least that's what my Dad used to tell me when I asked). It was "interesting" to see them trying some of the food my sister and her husband, and L and I ordered. My Dad had a look on his face with the Ginger Beef that was just like babies have when they get solid food for the first time. Probably what I looked like with my first beer.

I ate so much it hurt.

Only one light beer all night. Such a nice boy!

So if I ever get stuck out in Hell, at least I'll know where I can eat.